Moment Musicaux

Funny how everytime I manage to gather my thoughts, I feel much more at peace.

Being an eMoKiDdXzx is annoying and tiring, innit.

Anyway.

Was just speaking to the evil, grumpy, silver one about how I’m afraid that being in advertising will take away a lot of time from my external activities. The youths, the band, the church band. He, being his evil self, said "all no more lor". Then I realised that I’ll not miss out on anything — if I manage my time well.

Sad to say, I’m not really being ’seen’ in the YF nowadays. Well, if I can’t be around in church to do above-the-line stuff, I can always do below-the-line. Direct mailers! Ooh, so advertising. Ha.

What I can do (and am in the midst of doing) is put effort into unofficial mentoring, getting to know the youths on a more personal basis. It used to be the ‘up-there-leading’ Benita, but I’ve decided to be ‘down-there-supporting’.

(Don’t laugh. I may seem like the kind who loves the limelight, but hey. I won’t bother to try run that statement down. I have what’s that called, self-esteem.)

The schedule clash makes up only a tiny part of it.

How can a plant grow if emphasis is given to the flowers? Even beautiful flowers die when the stems do. It’s the roots and soil that decides if the plant thrives or dies. And I’m going to do my best to give good nourishment to a few roots.

‘A few’, not that I want to be selective or cliquish, but because I don’t want to compromise quality over quantity. With the limited amount of time on my hands, I can’t possibly be giving good attention to more than I can handle.

I agree that the case is that we tend to focus too much on the task at hand. And while doing so, neglect the important things in life, like upkeeping friendships, character building, maintaining good spiritual growth, and family.

Self-discipline and prioritisation! That’s my 5-year plan for my brain.

Discipline of the mind.

Something I wish I naturally possess. It’s the one ability I’m sorely lacking in my pursuit of anything.

Of late, I realise that I’m losing focus on any task at hand. And worse still, I can’t focus on everything else either. It’s starting to get quite draining.

There’re too many thoughts I need to sort out. Yes, prioritise…I know.

But this is what I’m seeing now — a mumble-jumble of scenes and thoughts in my head, flicking from one to the other. Like a remote control that has a jammed frame-skip button. Even sleep feels like R.E.M. for an entire night.

Excuses, excuses.

But honestly, this is one rare occasion that I seem to be unable to comprehend my emotions well.

I can’t wait for Australia. I’m in serious need to purge my system.

Such immaturity displayed is appalling. Much as my heart wants to ignore everything, it still hurts.
But I’m ever so glad that I made the right decision then.

Proverbs 16:2
"All a man’s ways seem innocent to him,
                            but motives are weighed by the LORD."

I rest my case.

Yippee! I hit a personal record of 86 for snooker. Erh, at least 30 points were from fouls of others though. Oops. It sucks to be short, because the view from the top is always more accurate. But at least I can feel my improvement.

Ego got the better of me when we switched to pool, because Joseph beat me the first time round. My solids were so badly clustered (3 at opposing banks!), and I willingly forked out an extra 70 cents just to stich up my wounds. Smack me, please.

 Smile, please, little one. It sucks to see you sad.

• "The High Cost of Faith" — An article on Hillsong Church.

The above-mentioned article that I came across on wooQ’s blog reminded me once again on what worship should really be about. I’ve never felt comfortable at any Festival of Praise events (which I’ve only attended 1 and 1/3 of), nor any worship sessions that have the barest semblence to something called MTV.

It’s unsettling how the audience would head bang to the pop sounds, scream at guitar solos, swoon when the bass runs, applaud and cheer their lungs out when the drums start double-pedalling. And all the masked, extravagant shouts of "Hallelujah!" by the lead vocalist. I mean, song leader.

Alright, alright. That’s left to be said by God.

I believe that music is a tool. And tools can be manipulated by human hands, both negatively and positively.

David calmed King Saul with his lyre; the Levites ministered through music. There’re many other instances in the Bible which involve singing and music, which mostly take place when the Lord showers His blessings. But music can also be used negatively. To draw people deep into technicalities; to pull the unassuming down hatred’s path.

After a brief search on worship, I found that there rarely (or even none) is any reference to music in the same context. When ‘worship’ is mentioned, people are bowing down in reverence and awe for the Lord. Or building an altar for sacrifice.

That said, a great amount of discernment is still required at all services and events alike. Even when ‘overwhelmed’ and emotional, we have to be clear about ourselves. Whether the heart is genuinely reflecting upon the Lord and praising Him, or has inadvertently been stirred up by the fantastic musicianship.

Quoting Jas, "If fantastic or flawless music is required to praise God, then we might as well save ourselves the trouble and commission world-class musicians to do the music while we sing, regardless of their spiritual background."

I’m not saying that music doesn’t have to be played well. Rather, it serves as a support to contemplation and praise, not a distraction. Poorly co-ordinated music distracts. Loud music distracts. Funky music distracts. So yes, it’s up to the congregation’s discretion.

Another point of ponder: service should always come from the heart.

It’s my stand that no one should be ‘forced’ into serving. Essentially, serving should be part of your want to return God a portion of what He has blessed you with. Your talents, your living conditions, your gifts, etc. Don’t let it border on becoming a wont, self-gratification, or routine.

So ultimately, it’s between you and God. Remember — He searches every part of you as you serve. And all He wants is a holy and pleasing sacrifice.

Have you had your lines blurred? Be very aware.
(I do struggle every now and then, too.)

What is your point of view? 

Proverbs 11:12
"A man who lacks judgment derides his neighbour,
but a man of understanding holds his tongue."

I watched, briefly, a DVD just — Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. Rare that I ever have a movie time.

Do you have memories that if you could, you would, erase forever?

Coming from myself, such is a pretty idealistic statement. But certain memories, sweet as they may be, seem to be better off forgetting. Like Eve and the forbidden fruit. Tempted, tasted, and back to haunt. Then you wish that Adam never existed — because you wouldn’t have either.

But here’s the cyclical thing: He knew that it was going to happen. He already knew. And it happened.

So, is it any good trying "to forget"?

When it involves the self, the emotions, I don’t believe in the word ‘forget’. As long as one has sanity, scars will remain. However, I believe that there’s much more to bearing hatred, and that is turning my heart towards God and the unconditional love He has given me. How can we proclaim God’s word if we don’t live it out?

I won’t say that I have truly forgotten, or forgiven. It lays dormant, sometimes creeping up silently. Yet amazingly, as if there’s an unseen caretaker, the earth shakes. And It, ashamed, turns tail and runs back into its cave. No doubt, it’s tiring. And I’ll keep praying till the day He removes this thorn in my flesh.

Force majeure.

What do you remember?

The smiles that were brought to your face or
an act of carelessness?

The many jokes that crack you up or
a sarcastic remark that cut the bone?

The little acts of care and concern or
a slip of the tongue regarding you,

The big amount of love that’s shown or
that one little breach of trust.

What do you remember?

Wake up, wake up. Are you still sleeping?
There’s poison ivy creeping, there’re eyes a-lookin’
And a tongue that balances a chalice –
both threatening to spill a new lease.

Pray tell, which clock makes you tick?
Or medicine that waters the sick
with an eye that isn’t perfectly black
keeps nothing in yet everything, intact.

Will wool ever dampen and drag sheep down?
Streams of precaution do run a-ground
for it heaps upon itself against the discourse
of nature, in its path destroying all but remorse.
 
Have you enough fought and flighted?
To be kept blameless by His standards
within self, statues written right
when everything finally comes to light.

My baby sister’s in secondary school, also in percussion(!), and almost my height now. The brother’s on a scholarship and finishing army. Dad now owns a lan shop, and mom’s still kicking butt at 51 in the kitchen, at home, and on the pickleball court. First in her age group, that is.

My family does rock.

One day, I want to also be able to speak these words with neither arrogance nor agenda. Just pure competence.

"I don’t care about what AWARD school."
— NJ, ECD.

One day.

Armed with a hypercardoid,
I picked up the same hostile vibe.

Look, no one’s indispensible! Even planets can get displaced from the solar system.

(Not literally, lah.) 

Here’s an excerpt: "a committee of astronomers and historians has proposed a new definition of the word "planet" that would expand at a stroke the family of planets from 9 to 12 and leave textbooks and charts in thousands of classrooms out of date."

I was quite tickled when I read this article. Science is a fascinating enrichment of the mind, but I wonder where it really leads to. Will this end up for the greater good of mankind? Or is this just another episode of human desire, to fully comprehend the universe and all that’s in it, so that they can stroke their egos and be in ‘command’?

2,500 astronomers will gather in Prague to vote on the outcome on Wednesday, 25 August.

Wait, there’s more.

"Many astronomers began to argue that it made more sense to think of Pluto as a Kuiper Belt object, a minor planet instead of a planet. When it was reported that the Hayden Planetarium had done just that in its new Rose Center, which opened in 2000, a firestorm erupted. Schoolchildren rushed to the defense of lonely little Pluto."

Roflmao. Come on, kiddos. Rush to the defense of your dying human counterparts.

Never let the urgent crowd out the important.
I’ll always bear this lesson in mind. 

PR is an art
Respect is a craft

Mundane Updates.

edit: Actually, my life isn’t the least bit mundane now. I’m doing what I truly enjoy, I’ve found my genuine pillars of strength, I’m living my days with a purpose. No more the brash, decadent lifestyle of thrills and spills. Funny how a few months can change one so much, not to mention the past 3 years.

Looking back on how I was forced to take the harsher settings of emotions in full blast prematurely, I comfort myself to know that I’ve emerged victorious. Thank God. (:

• So I got a O2 XDA II mini at a steal, courtesy of my colleague. Hooray! The N7270’s volume increase button is spoilt — I can hardly hear anyone who calls. D’oh. =|

• My trip to Gold Coast’s official: SQ 235/SQ 236 September 4 to 15! I’ll be back by then to spend the weekend with my closest, in time for my birthday. And Adam’s, haha.

• Jamming yesterday was fun. Keeping time is a problem still, though. Must learn not to be over-absorbed in the music. Bleh. It still makes me nervous sometimes to think that my band is technically made up of 3 drummers. And the band’s drummer is the weakest drummer amongst them all.

  Never mind. Practicepracticepractice!!!

  Anyway, I’ve only one band now, yet there’s a strong notion within me that this band will be for keeps. Bonk and I go a long way back, and Adam’s just mad. (: They say that I should save my cue money for drumming gear. What, cymbals and pedals and snares but no drum set?? Ha. Blame the parents and Block 12, thank you very much.

• I’ve gotten my electives chosen, which I almost forgot about. After seeking advice from the evil mentor and friends, my top 3 choices are Advertising Creatives, Acting Workshop and IMC. Sounds like good fun. Pat Wong is grading my IAP report instead of my LO because he’s left the school and country; sigh only can keep my fingers and toes crossed for my A.

Okay this post sounds really awkward. Mundane updates are easier to do on a daily basis I guess. Perhaps I’m starting to get into a ‘don’t care’ mindset… Some things are really better off NOT BOTHERING. Or CARING.

Really, I can be such a goof-up. 

I won’t even title this post. I’m speechless beyond words.
It’s quite obvious. There’s no going back.
Damn the fool.

So weirdly parallel, save the
absence of irrevocable commitment

The yearning, a thirteenth sin
fighting tooth and nail in a dream

To false insecurities, betrayal hot
and threatening to spill

From lips intruded, parted
to find filled with chagrin.

Disappointment rife, a heart
that holds a knife. Sic.

What’s going on…

• Non-hijackable planes? — The ECD figures that making everyone wear transparent labcoats and the Con Air method works best. Nobody leaves the seat, nobody gets hurt.

• Lobal warfare — Battle of the gender matter.

• Altoids infiltrates eBay! – Curiously Strong, Chocolate-dipped Altoids, anyone?

• Agency.com: Hit or Misfit? — Subway asks for a 5 minute pitch video. Agency.com gives 9 and a half, and a Youtube appearance which garners 70,000 and counting views in a week.

  Maybe their hobo, take-to-the-streets (or Madison Ave) vox pop methods were too pariah for detractors, because them big names can easily afford market research companies to do the job.

  With the sub-par acting (fine, they’re ad-people) and a bit of shooting in the foot, it’s a mistake trying to ‘viralise’ it on Youtube. Response generated, check. Good response? Question mark.

  It’s a nice as a pitch video effort, but to plenty else, it yells blasé.

  Anyhow, it’s weirdly funny to see everyone trying to make no sense of the word ‘viral’.

• Agency.com fights back with their very own website on ‘What is Viral Marketing’. Guaffaw.

Competitive sports seems to be largely missing in my life, much as I’ve been at sports for years. It’s always been for leisure’s sake, and the highest level I’ve played competitively was primary school zonal. Ha.

To an extent, I’ve never really pushed myself in the mental discipline required of any sport. Which, perhaps, is why I have such a short attention span.

But heck, I love playing sports, whether competitive or not. Even sports that don’t really create perspiration, like billiards. Billiards is the mental game.

I finally touched the snooker table after a spell of more than a year. I managed to hit an average of 40, I think. Didn’t really calculate my score though.

We cleared 2 games in around 30 minutes, which is a great improvement from our 3 games in one-and-a-half hours many moons ago. Pity that my opponent was too tired — maybe we could have cleared the table even faster.

At least I felt the improvement in my stroking and shot accuracy, many thanks to uncle Jamie who helped me change my game.

When I first started out, my playing posture emulated Jimmy White’s because of influence. But after realising that my stroking has always been inconsistent because of a certain erm, hindrance… I switched my resting leg over to the left.

Voila, big difference. 

Funny how things have really changed. Well, change is good I guess.

Anyway, a colleague has invited me to go over to this in-condo pub that he owns (near my area!) to play pool for his club. Apparently they take part in the New Paper’s After 5 competitions. It’s high time I get down to more mental discipline training!

So it seems like I’ll have to buy a snooker cue. It’s more worth than getting a pool cue; it can be used for both games.

But for now, I’m in dire need of funds.

I seem be raking up countless debts now.

Where’s my pay!!!

Stay away from these rocks
We’d be a walking disaster

My mind is like my clothes’ cupboard. Full of clothes old and new, unorganised and messy to the core.

At least I’ve found somebody and something I’ve always needed. And not everyone gets to find such as these. Wait, I think I made no sense with what I just said. Bah.

So.

Next up: there’s something wrong with this photo. And others, which can be found here.

It’s a sad time for photojournalists all over the world. Reuters, yes the news source of the world, has admitted to using doctored images on it’s website. Oh dear. What’s this world coming to?

An end, I say.

More of such stuff found by this blog.
 

All hail the smartest she in the world.

v. hailed, hail·ing, hails
v. intr.

1. To precipitate in pellets of ice and hard snow.
2. To fall like hailstones: Condemnations hailed down on them.

v. tr.

Source: The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition
Copyright © 2000 by Houghton Mifflin Company.

I really don’t have to say much. (:
Hope you enjoyed today!! I did! Yahoooo!

iLUBchooManYmAnYwOrxXxXXXx*~*~*!!

GO, ROCKERAHMARRRRRRR!

SEE THIS LINK?

NOW THAT YOU HAVE, YOU’RE OBLIGED TO VOTE FOR THE FIRST CAMPAIGN YOU SEE.
Which is A, of course.

Not because my mentor is part of the team, but because it is definitely better than the rest. Okay lah, no obligations. I really have no need to beg shamelessly.

So do be objective. Consider all aspects — from idea, quality and right down the real reason behind advertising: effectiveness.

May the best ad win.